Teaching Good Manners: Part 5

This fifth and final segment of Teaching Good Manners are general tips that cover a variety of situations. These can be found on pages 132-133 in the book, Disciplines of a Godly Family, by Kent and Barbara Hughes:

1. Knock before you enter a room if the door is closed.
2. If you chew gum in public, do it discreetly and with your mouth closed.
3. Return everything you borrow in the same condition as when you received it, or better.
4. If you lose or break something you have borrowed, even from a relative, replace it.
5. Cover your mouth when you sneeze or cough.
6. Teach your sons to show deference to the opposite sex and the elderly. Encourag ethem to offer to help you (the mother), or any woman, bring in the groceries or packages. Instruct them to unhesitatingly offer their seat to a woman or someone in need in a crowded public place. When walking with a female, boys should walk on the side closest to the street. They should help women and girls with their chair at the table and should open doors for them as well. Although a few women may think such actions are insulting or condescending, we have found that most women appreciate the courtesy.
7. Return telephone calls. (Fletcher’s footnote: Reply to personal e-mail messages, too, provided that they come from a trusted source.)
8. Promptly pay back money you borrow – even a quarter.
9. Be respectful of national flags.
10. Be patient with service people who may find it difficult or confusing counting change or taking your order.
11. Teach your children how to behave with the handicapped. Discreetly explain why they may be different, but teach your children they are just like them, and certainly equals. Explain why most public places have wheelchair ramps and bathroom facilities designed to help the disabled. Instruct your children not to speak in a louder tone of voice to a handicapped person unless the person suggests it, and forbid them to stare. Teach them to treat the handicapped like everyone else, as naturally as possible. Above all, encourage your children not to shy away from conversation with handicapped people.

Manners do not make the man or woman. The radical reorientation that says “my life for your life” can only come from the regenerating work of Christ, who instills his life and ethic in us. Nevertheless, manners teach the need for and complement the character that Christ’s life gives. Lives that say “my life for yours” are channels of God’s grace to a needy world.